Bliss

‘At what age do you think it is appropriate to inform your children that they have no legitimate purpose in life and that no matter what they do it will be for nothing?’

I have sympathy for anyone that possesses such pessimism when contending my world view. If a road has an end, why shouldn’t I enjoy the ride?
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Do such parents use the same logic when they are watching a movie or reading a book? Playing in a water park or listening to an album? All of these fun activities have an ending, an expiration date. I would never be selfish enough to tell my children, if I do one day have children, to refrain from enjoying our precious time on earth because one day it will be gone. If anything, each splash in the water park will be cherished greatly. I have more reasons to take my children places. To be that hurt by such a prospect that you inflict negativity onto your children, that is a very shitty move.

Be a better parent than that. Maybe then children won’t have to worry about what their parents think and of their own personal choices in life. Sadly, too many adults punish children for not fitting into the family ‘criteria’.

Your preferred view of this world will not effect reality but if you let your children be free to make their own decisions, their lives may one day change our reality for the better.

Priorities

The clock barely struck noon. As I ordered I wondered if it was too early for such large quantities of meat, at just £9.50 for two courses I was going to give this great Turkish restaurant my best shot. I spent late morning/early afternoon with my mum, I need to make family time when I can. September is just around the corner, relatively speaking.

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I have realised after the loss of my dad that family time cannot be a burden. I used to take it for granted, only for a great part of it to be taken from me without much warning. Three months to be exact. I have started to cherish the family arguments and fall outs a lot more, these in turn have become few and far between. We spend much more time making time of value, it is a great shame that we sometimes learn lessons after the test.

I have also learned that as far as I may search for someone that shares my core beliefs and ideologies, the ones bringing me up may be the best people to speak to. I may spend my whole life looking for someone that understands me as well as my family. Some people do not have this, a huge reason as to why I blog. I hear of family members being disowned or shunned out by family for thinking differently, I cannot believe this is a reality so many have to face. The irony of being an atheist is that despite my appreciation for stars forming the beings that brought me into this world and proving shelter and care, if I was born at the wrong time and into the wrong family, they may punish me for coming to such a conclusion. The love of a parent perceived from a scientific perspective is too much for some parents, rejecting a religious outlook can lead to a complete reversal of such love, whether it be abandonment or even murder. This terrifies me. The fact that some people on earth can show love until you openly practice a separate belief… If this love can be taken so quickly, was the love there at all?

I thank my family, those still with me and the ones that aren’t, for allowing me to come to my own conclusions. You are the tolerant heroes I need in an intolerant world.

‘Love you x’

Things have changed since I lost my dad. Some much more notable than others. One of these changes is that on every evening,  my sister and I exchange a ‘goodnight’ via text, even if we haven’t spoken at all that day. She lives in Edinburgh, I am a couple of hours south in Newcastle. I talk to my mum more often as, well, that is what mothers do. They phone for a catch up every other day and I greatly appreciate that now. Checking I have enough money and asking who the girls in my latest Facebook picture is.

My biggest regret I have after my dad died was not making him enough cups of tea. He was a true Englishman in this sense. In fact, I cannot remember a time in which he wasn’t on the couch gulping down a cuppa like it was going out of fashion. As he died young, (barely in his 60’s, I was 24) I was a typical son, saving my energy for my much needed procrastination. My dad, thankfully enjoyed being a dad and providing for me. How I wish I put as much effort in now and returned the favour.

Not that I didn’t, one negative aspect of losing someone close to you is that you overthink what you did not do and forget what you did do, a message very similar to the one I posted here recently in 151,600 people won’t see this today. I forget the times I did say I love you and the presents I bought, whilst feeling the overwhelming guilt that I have for failing to be such a good son every single day, as if I knew my fathers demise was around the corner. I was not a bad son, I like to think my dad was very proud of me. He said he was, however hindsight is a terrible thing. It is only when you lose someone so valuable, someone there from your literal day one, you know how empty it is without them and how you could have been better yourself. And when it is from day one, it is very hard to picture a life when they are no longer there that morning. When it is all you have ever known, anything else is very hard to grasp, yet this makes me try my hardest to grasp concepts that I cannot imagine. I know there are things I don’t know, people and things I will miss when they are gone, even if I don’t know how they will affect me. This is a beauty in its own right, and a mystery that keeps me inspired and trying to be the best person I can.

The travel dilemmas of the son of a widowed mum

I have a few friends currently in Australia and I have been thinking a lot recently. For someone with OCD (genuine OCD, not the kind everyone claims to have), it’s what I do. Am I still young enough at the ripe old age of 28 to take a year out and travel solo? I hope so. Do I want to? Hell yes. 

It seems like an easy decision. It would be, however after my fathers passing in 2013 I would feel uncomfortable to leave my mother behind for such a long duration. 


My mother still has my sister, however my extended family are spread around the UK. My family are travellers, not the gypsie kind but the kind to enjoy life and go wherever it takes them. It’s a bittersweet feeling to travel like I did care free in 2010. Then, my mam and dad had each other. Yes, that’s how we say ‘mum’ in the north-east of England, we like to say things differently here. 

On the contrary, such a trip may be a blessing. I think of the opportunity my Mam and sister may have to visit a country they have always wanted to, if I head there for July it gives them plenty of time to save and make it for those New Years Eve fireworks in Sydney. None of us can afford that, but fuck it. 

This is why I blog, we only have one life and I want to live it.

Hating those that love us to love one that hates us

It is a very depressing fact that we are willing to abandon those that are so close to us in the hope of pleasing a deity that we have never met. I know personally of one occasion where a child has been kicked out of the family home. I have heard friends in the States (TX in particular) aware of this happening.

It isn’t uncommon. Videos on YouTube can be found of angered parents, this one in particular annoys the hell out of me. 

There are also multiple Reddit posts from kids asking for advice from the community. I was reading one in which parents had snooped into the child’s inbox on Facebook, reading his conversations with a friend on how they were no longer religious. His bags were packed and on the drive when he came back from school that day, the door unanswered regardless of how long he had knocked.


To feel such anger towards your own child is beyond my comprehension. Even this is pretty tame in comparison to violence and murder seen towards infidels and those leaving religion in some of the more oppressed regions of the world. How can religion claim to be necessary for morality if love and compassion can be switched off like a light overnight?

Edinburgh: Haggis cheeseburgers anyone?

As you may be aware I have been absent from WordPress today (sorry!), I had a 6.30am journey to the train station en route to Edinburgh to spend a day with family.

It’s now just after midnight and I’m one cold, tired blogger.

Edinburgh is a beautiful (currently freezing) city. 

  

Very multicultural however there was one thing on the menu I had to try…
  
A cheeseburger with a top layer of haggis, it was as delicious as it was filling. 

Well I thought so.

As I type this I’m realising I forgot to grab a deep fried Mars bar whilst I was up there, I’m sure it will be worth the train journey back again.

Have any of my readers tried any interesting foods? I haven’t been the most adventurous in comparison to the food blogs out there but there isn’t much I will turn down. Frog legs and salt and vinegar flavoured crickets are probably the best example of interesting foods I’ve tried. Any vegan/vegetarian examples?

Why do you think religion differs so much across the pond?

  
Is it that British history, full of both war and religion, has turned modern Britain away from our past ideologies?
Is it because Americans want to keep up the traditions early settlers left behind when finding a new life in unfamiliar surroundings?

Do you think it is down to something completely different?